{blah, blah, whah, blah}

So, the nursing issues are not getting better and my runt now weighs a whopping 7lbs 3oz at one month old. She's teeny and still wears her preemie and newborn clothes (except that her height is increasing so she's now getting too tall for them. But newborn sizes are still too big for her. Ugh.) Of course, everyone wants a healthy and growing baby, but my true incentive is the closet full of ADORABLE clothes waiting for her to grow.

I've been working with a lactation specialist from the hospital and also the La Leche League to no avail. I pump non-stop and still feed her at-the-breast so she won't forget how and my milk supply still shrinks instead of grows. I had my hormones tested to make sure I wasn't hypothyroid again which caused my milk to diminish lightening-fast when I was nursing Eli. I even had my prolactin tested.

The results are in. My prolactin is normal. My thyroid hormone, TSH, is 0.09! (1-4 is normal and I was 130.5 when I lost my supply with Eli - yikes.) So, I'm not hypOthyroid this time, I'm hypERthyroid. The worst part is that the test was done two weeks ago and the doc INCREASED my daily hormone dosage so that number is definitely MUCH lower now.

I am all-too familiar with how hypothyroidism affects my milk supply - been there, done that - but I am not familiar with hyperthyroidism so I decided to do a little research. This is what I found on the FIRST page I came across...

"Some women who are hypothyroid, myself included, appear to have problems with milk supply. I my case, I was very much in favor of breastfeeding my daughter, and prior to her birth, I had read several books, gone to a La Leche meeting, had some advance training from my doula (birth attendant), and after Julia was born, had several sessions with the hospital's lactation consultant. I felt thoroughly prepared to nurse my daughter, and after she was born, all the experts assured me that she had latched on fine and we were doing well. After a week, however, she hadn't had many wet or dirty diapers, and had lost weight. I was not becoming engorged in between nursings, and after more visits to the lactation consultants and doula, the theory was that I didn't have a sufficient enough milk supply, and Julia didn't have a very strong sucking reflex. After trying many methods of increasing milk supply recommended by the various resources I called on -- everything from herbs like fenugreek, a nursing vacation, and nursing every 2 hours -- Julia continued to lose weight. At the three-week point, the pediatrician insisted that I add supplemental formula for Julia. Julia immediate began gaining weight. At that point, I also turned to pumping to help increase my milk supply, and despite a program of pumping, nursing and using the supplemental nursing system, I was able to pump only about half the typical milk supply of other mothers at this post-partum stage. It was then clear that I had a low milk supply, and had probably had if from the beginning. Suspecting my thyroid was out of whack, I was tested, and they discovered that I'd become very hyperthyroid, with a TSH level of less than .05. My dosage was readjusted to return me to the TSH 1 to 2 range, but this never resulted in a rebound in milk supply. It may have been too late to kickstart it. But my recommendation is new mothers might want to get TSH tested a few days after delivery, so dosage modifications can be made right away if needed. Despite the low milk supply, I did manage to successfully pump about half of Julia's needed milk until she was six months old, when my supply stopped. I am still proud of this accomplishment, given the challenges. "

Oh my gosh!!! That is exactly what I have been dealing with. Prepared and confident to nurse this time around (especially after repairing the thyroid issues I had last time), baby losing weight, no engorgement or sign of good milk supply from the beginning, unable to pump sufficient amounts, pediatrician highly suggesting formula for baby, any supplements and pumping do not improve supply, even the consultants can't fix me (like I said in the blog title, blah, blah, blah). I was so excited, annoyed, frustrated, discouraged and more to read this. It's almost refreshing to find someone out their who knows just what I'm going through, however, I don't like her outcome so I am pretending not to have read that. It's back to the endo for me to get an adjustment in my meds but hopefully this turns around quickly because I am getting less and less everyday.

Oh yeah, that boob bottle has helped Ava to feed better on the breast. It just seems like she's still not getting anything, but I think that's just how it feels on my end, so who knows. Poor girl. But we make sure she's fed when she's hungry while we work through this. Hopefully I can be fixed before it's too late to fix me. (sigh)